Seriously, I do and don’t want to hear it anymore. The outpour of devastation is too big. The loneliness people are enduring….the fears, the unknown. Seniors suffer and fear for their lives, kids are terrified – I mean, I don’t even know how to wrap my brain around the magnitude of this monster – how is a child to be expected to do so?!
I appreciate it though…
Yeah, I said it. I believe I am not alone. I appreciate the Coronavirus era while knocking on wood, humanity will come out a bit more humble and recognizing; and of course hoping it will only take for as long as it must. May this experience of having to brace ourselves against this power let us readapt to some more basic being- and living ways.
Observing this from home, reading about Coronavirus and COVID19 and how far our country and the world has come with shutting shit down left and right, and closings….I can’t help but think, this isn’t too bad after all.
Admitting to the anxiety it gives me and the thoughts I have about it, I find myself constantly being redirected from thinking “How far will this katastrophe go? When can it be contained? How many people will it take? Nobody deserves this,…” to this “Look at all these people being away from the street, being home spending time with their family, helping their seniors and others. The air is so much cleaner, there are so little cars on the roads. Superbowl Sunday is nothing compared to this…”.
So many uncountable people are reaching back to resources of the olden days. Life is becoming more basic. We only make necessary trips to the store. We walk, jog, hike, move in some sort of isolation -well, the mandatory 6ft rule. Life is at a standstill. It is good. It is also, just as disastrous. Many people have lost their very necessary jobs, some are even losing their businesses. Many households now have at least- unfortunately, one parent at home forced out of work. The good is the time made available to care for the children, the household, the role of one working, one being the families caregiver…as it was the norm many years ago. Many women, men have looked up old women’s remedies…the homemade ones, (can’t really find anything to boost your immunity in the stores, nowadays) you know, all old fashioned type. Here!! I am one of these women. I love herbs and everything growing that can be used for medicine making and healing, since pre- COVID19 times. Homemade remedies -provided by mother. My Mamas first Onion/Honey syrup had me convinced. It was then, as a child, so utterly disgusting, it had to work. In Germany we say” The shittier it tastes, the better it works.” As I grew older I started to love the flavor of it. Now we switch it up between the Onion/Honey Syrup and Fire Cider to keep our immunity at a peek. We make it ourselves.
Anyways, back to now. Households, due to lack of jobs, are missing out on money. A lot of much needed money! Bills are due, food is running short, eventually people will be running out of gas because the money is running out, while that is, on the contrary currently at $1.69 in some areas of Western North Carolina. Ay, what the hell?! Here is another one: Do you know how many people I see on Instagram, talking about how they have been baking, canning and processing, preserving foods? It is incredible. Incredible in the same way the people using home remedies again, is. Listen up!
See how these circumstances are taking us back to the good old days? The olden days. The other day I opened my laptop as one of the kids says ” I wish I had a laptop.” I responded gently but kind of amused:” Sweet child, when I was your age (11) I had no laptop”. Him,” that’s because there were no laptops in the olden days”. This was great. The fact that my kid thinks I am from the “olden days” had me all excited. To me, these years sound hard but precious. Precious as in the relationships to things, needs and wants, have been totally different. There was no such thing as convenience. Humans were healthier, people treated each other with more respect and morals. Basic. Hands on. There was bread kneading to feed, today- most bread on the shelf is precut. Then, there was a lot of hard work as in gardening, farming, building and creating – food, agriculture, children, home, just everything was extreme hands on and if you didn’t do it, there was no quick fix to it. You didn’t have, get, use, etc… it. Today, we just buy a new one. We throw away. We waste. We waste just about fucking everyting!! Time, love, relationships in every form, money – wholly shit do we waste money, and gas. In the United States its common to drive across the parking lot or leave the car running. No kidding, this is real – just as real as the food that is being thrown away just because we are ‘full’ or done, so we can save room for desert. That processed stuff. But look around, look at all the shelves. I see, next to toiletpaper of course, what is missing are vegetables, flour, eggs, milk, even the dry yeast, sheesh, half the produce section is always empty. Because people are starting to make again. We are digging our hands in. When one is home, suddenly there is time. Time to be patient with the kids. Time to cook from scratch and smell up the house, time to preserve foods for days like these, time to create. We have time to create life again in a more healthy and aware manner. Time for basics – and the awareness of relationship to everything but mostly presence. We are super present currently. We are living conscious because we have no idea what the hell is going on. Well, we have a semi idea. That magnitude of a global virus, … poah!
But, I am hurt. I am hurt for the elderly community, for affected people and the people at risks. The devastation of isolation is unimaginable drastic, especially, who wants to be alone through this? Who wants to be quarantined to such extend…and then dying this way? The hurt to just think of it is unbarable. But this is why I think about this pandemic the way I do. It is incredibly hard to do so. The consequences of this pandemic, the numbers we follow….while having this amount of empathy we currently all carry we are being put to a brutal stop.
The backhand from the Mother.
We humans have long ago overstepped our boundaries. We, the ones that feel entitled to everything, the only ones our planet can do without. The only ones thinking they are invincible. We done gone fucked sh!t up, in our very ignorant and royal, self-approved way. If we compare ourselves to every other species, organism, ecosystem, little universe….whatever it is that is not human but living, we are the ones that think they need to come up with better, bigger, more massive. Do we even know how to just thrive? Meh…MORE. We are this virus, a pest, a unstoppable fungus to our one and only habitat. And you know what is even more crazy: We seriously just wreck all these things that are so much more needed, bigger, ungraspable, magical, than we ever will be, no matter how small they are. We are magical beings of the same Whole, yet – they may just not wreck havoc to our extent. Isn’t it funny how we are having the privilege to being here, without a need to the planet to exist, with everything and all provided to all existing creatures, for us, together, that all we need to do is take the provisions and treat, and maintain the planet in good health in return. “Only put the work in we need to live a grateful life, plenty full and healthy, without greed” That is seriously life. That is all. BASIC SHIT! And we, with the bigger, more, better attitude…are so over filled with ego, we don’t know how to save ourselves because of convenience mindsets, while destroying everything else that we need to exist.
Bull fucking shit! Those are my two cents. I really am aware that this pandemic is a brutal hard-hit to every one. And people really suffer and it is extremely tragic. But presently, during these unprecedented times I have no control over anything but my part and what I am doing, who I am being. I am beyond grateful for my families “olden days” lifestyle. We can have plenty homemade, raised, and preserved food. The kids are home and healthy. We sleep in the forest alot, we create food, we build our home, we reevaluate. We are here together sharing love without rush. My husband and I get to hang out and chat and chill for 30 minutes on our bed like teenagers, just because we can take that break time under these circumstances every day to embrace solitude and relationship together.
When it comes to the planet, we are not perfect but we try our best and certainly do what we can to our abilities. We try our hardest to reuse and recycle everything that comes through our hands. Everything must serve a purpose, otherwise we do not keep or obtain it. We try our most to eliminate single use plastic. We shop 85% at Thrift Stores and live as sustainable as our present times allow us. Yes, we are working on it all and strive to leave a smallest, modest footprint off the grid. But it is hard. Crazy hard. Our pledge is to never go backwards from progress we have made, never stand still where we are, if we are not moving we are getting no where. Forward, always forward and doing our best to become better for our Whole (earthlings, environment, planet, everything)….
I hope all stay home and safe. Embrace stillness and solitude. Be there for others as much as you can. Care for your community. Wash hands often, don’t touch your face. One hand washes the other….slow down and just breathe. This will pass, and we shall become more humble and recognizing. The mother, treat her good and she will treat us good. But every now and then we just may need a backhand…